It’s that time of year again! When Halloween stores everywhere try to get us all to dress like hobags. Deva, my blogging buddy from MyLifeSuckers and I started looking at some of the costumes out there this year and HOLY HELL! We came across a whole category of sexy children’s character costumes. You know, costumes […]
Getting Off On The Wrong Foot
The best thing about having a blog and a Facebook page is the immediate feedback from readers. Receiving comments and messages from fans telling me that something I wrote really made them laugh, or inspired them to start their own blog, touched them or just made them think– that is really gratifying. Just kidding– the […]
My Musical Tourettes
Friends, I’d like to talk to you about a serious affliction I’ve been saddled with for most of my life. It affects me and probably millions of you out there. Let’s lift the veil of shame and talk about it: It’s called Musical Tourettes. Musical Tourettes is a disorder often onset in late adolescence, characterized […]
Wow, Walmart. Wow.
A few months ago, I was invited to a casting call for a television commercial. The details were vague but I’m an attention whore so I said what the hell. I was given an address which was some random warehouse in the middle of town. I told a few people what I was doing, mainly […]
You’re Welcome, Manuel
Hi, Manuel- Let’s not make this any more awkward than it already is. You just saw me naked. I know- you just came over to trim the trees with your crew. I wasn’t really aware of the extent of the trimming about to take place, because, well, I don’t give a shit about tree trimming- […]
Housewife Hoedown!
I realize my last blog post was very personal, heartfelt and touching and that probably confused the hell out of you, so how’s about I regale you with the time I bought a dildo from my neighbor? Alrighty then! There is a little known secret of the suburbs you city-dwellers may not be aware of. […]
¡Eye Caramba!
If you know anything about me, you know that diet and exercise are paramount in my life. I treat my body like a temple. A temple that hosts a donut and vodka festival every weekend. But every once in a while even I reach a saturation point. I look at my ass (or worse- a […]
Pervert Magnet
Oh- hello there, perverts! I bet you were expecting some really juicy stuff to pop up on this page because you were trolling the interwebs for something dirty. Sorry suckas! It’s just my blog. But now that you’re here let’s talk about you and your problem. Why you do that “eeww” do that you do […]
Vermont is for Lesbians
So, I went to Vermont recently. I went with a friend. I’ll call her Sherry. Sherry just loves Vermont because she is rich. Rich people just love Vermont. I guess it’s because the whole state is like a little postcard of white bread patrician wholesomeness. It’s so clean and everyone there looks outdoorsy and freshly […]
